The Eating of the Cake

One of the great stories of our water polo season this year was the Cake Incident. Why capitalize it? Well, because it was that big of a deal. It all began as simple preparation for an away game. Myself and the girls were dutifully waiting for our bus on the pool deck when one of my boy swimmers shows up. He had a massive cake with him that was made to show trench warfare during WWI. I told him that he did a nice job, and he asked me where he could get rid of it. I told him to take it to buildings and grounds to get rid of it and he asked if he could just leave it there on the pool deck. Now, I should mention that the girls were very excited about the prospect of eating said cake. However, since we were getting ready to leave, I did not want them to go nuts on the cake, so I told them no cake.

Well, I made the mistake of leaving the pool deck to see if our bus had arrived without making sure the cake was indeed gone. When I came back, not only was the cake sitting on the pool deck, it was in a box, but the girls were on their hands and knees digging into the the thing, literally. Even though there were some forks, my well mannered lady water polo players were on their hands and knees digging into the cake with no utensils. Needless to say, I was not pleased.

Now if the girls were to tell this story, they would paint the picture of a fire breathing monster who went into a rage when I saw what was going on, but my response was slightly more measured than that, slightly. I won't lie, I was pretty pissed. Not only had the swimmer defied what I said, but the girls did to. When I came back in, I politely asked that they disengage themselves from the cake and kindly retrieve the person who had left it there. My tone might have been a little harsh and my voice elevated. But what really got me mad was the response by one of the girls who shouted out, "We'll stop eating this cake when you stop drinking pop!"

This sent me over the edge. Now I am not really a yeller, but I was yelling that day. I couldn't believe the audacity of that player to actually said what she said. On top of that, the girls were acting as if they had never eaten before and in their frenzy, made a complete mess of the deck. There was chocolate frosting everywhere and I was not a happy camper. Our pool deck is not a cafeteria and I did not like the fact that it was being treated as one. Well, eventually the cake was cleaned up and the girls were rather contrite after seeing my reaction. However, the story does not end there.

If my girls are known for one thing, it is ordering t-shirts, and this year was no exception. Last year's shirts were Battlestar Galactica themed, and this years shirt was designed around the Cake Incident. I had no idea what they were going to propose until they showed it to me. I have the final say, because it needs to be appropriate above all other things, but when the unveiled it, I had to laugh. On the back of the shirt is the quote, "Let Them Eat Cake." This shirt was so damn clever, I had to allow it, even if it was making fun of me. It showed the girls that I cannot be serious all the time, nor should I be. Plus, it is hysterical. So, if you ever see me wearing that shirt, this is the story behind it.

Absence Makes the Heart Grow Fonder?

No, your eyes are not deceiving you, this is a new post and it has been nearly seven months since we have last posted an update. Things are going fairly well in the Ortiz household. I think we have settled in to this whole marriage thing with just a few small speed bumps in between. I mean, let's be honest, we still disagree about the same things. If I thought that getting married would magically make Mar a prompt person, take me to the psych ward. Just as if she expected me to not leave an occasional pair of socks on the bathroom floor, she would be equally crazy. Anyway, our wedding was a grand old time and I will have to go into more detail about it soon. Besides continuing to drive each other crazy, we have pretty much been consumed with work.

I am still working at the high school and coaching. I have been Chili's free since November, but I have a feeling that streak is going to be over soon. In addition to water polo, I started coaching swimming this year. It was a bit of a change, considering I coached boys instead of girls, but it was a blast nonetheless. Boys are quite a bit different than girls, actually, a lot different. They are not nearly as respectful of other people, and I say that with a bit of a skewed perspective because girls can be a handful too. My boys also had a problem with a little something we call going to practice. That was not a joke either. Christmas break was totally ridiculous. There was several practices where I only had half of my boys, and that was very upsetting. In the end, it was the boys who saw their results suffer, so I guess you could call it a learning experience, but it was frustrating nonetheless. By the end of the season, all the boys dropped time, and I had a lot of fun. Along the way, I also picked up a new nickname: Ortizzle.

As for the girls, it was a dynamite season. My JV finished with a record of 20-8, which was a very pleasant surprise. It was the first time either of our levels had ever had a twenty win season. Along the way, we managed to lose two games in a row only once, put together an eight game winning streak, won the regular season title and beat our number one rival for the first time ever. It was awesome. On top of that, the chemistry on the team was awesome. That is not to say that there were not a couple of dust ups here and there, but for the most part, the girls got along and we played as a team. And for the second year in a row, they managed to drive me crazy whenever the situation presented itself. Overall, it was a great year, and I was sorry to see it end.

Well, that is it for now. I just wanted you guys to know that we are still alive and ticking. Hope to see or hear from all of you soon.