The Most Important Moment of My Childhood

Sit back folks, this is going to take awhile. During my absence, a very important day passed. While to most people May 4th is the day before Cinco de Mayo, for me it signifies the most important event of my childhood, if not life. (I mean no disrespect to Marilyn by making that statement, and you will soon read why)

May 4, 1992 was the day that I nearly lost my brother Frank. On this date, sixteen years ago, my one and only brother was hit by a car after we had gotten off of our school bus. Frank was twelve and I was eleven. The impact form the collision sent him about forty feet. He had a compound fracture of his left leg and serious head trauma. After he landed on the pavement, I ran straight to him to see if he was okay. He was in a severe state of shock and could not communicate with me or anyone else. The spot of blood on his jeans marked the spot where he leg was fractured and he had a dazed look on his face. Needless to say, he was rushed to the hospital.

Keep in mind I was still a child, so looking back on things, I do not think I instantly understood the ramifications of the situation. Being naive, I fully expected things to go back to normal in a relatively short amount of time, but I was sorely mistaken. Frank was sent to Loyola Hospital, and the painful waiting game began. Due to brain swelling, he was place in a drug induced coma for ten days. Needless to say, those were the ten longest days of my life.

One night that sticks out in my mind in particular. Naturally, my parents had a much better understanding of the situation. As I was getting ready for bed, my dad came into my room and explained the gravity of the situation. The doctors had given my brother a very grave prognosis, if fact, they said he recovery was a highly unlikely. That night, I literally cried myself to sleep. To me, it was totlaly unfathomable that I would grow up without my brother. Fortunately, I never had to face this reality.

The accident occurred with one month left in school, and after being held out for about a week, I went back. This was both traumatic and a relief at the same time. The relief came in the form of some normalcy in my life, whatever that really means. However, the trauma came in the way that I was treated. My fellow students were instructed not to speak to me about the accident, for fear that it would set me off. This translated to constant questions about how he was doing, and isolation from the fear of setting me off, whatever that means. Looking back on it, I understand that my classmates meant well, and perhaps it was the adults who were trying to protect me, that really made the situation difficult. Things eventually started to feel comfortable and school was a welcome relief.

Well, eventually my brother woke up. I got the news at school, and that will always be a great memory for me. My dad came to school to tell me in person and that night, I got to go see Frank. The moment will be etched in my mind forever. He was connected to several tubes an wires, but there was no denying that glimmer in his eye. When I walked in, he demanded that I come by his side so he could see me. I nervously walked up to him to say hi, and he recognized me instantly. This is honestly one of the greatest moments in my life. My parents were beaming and I think that there was a relief to Frank as well. When he woke up, he did not know where he was or what had happened. The situation was explained and he instantly asked for my presence.

Now that I was there, I feel like it was something that made the situation easier for him. As I mentioned, he was connected to an innumerable amount of tubes and cords, and he was holding a blue ball. The ball was meant to be a stress reliever, and I'll be damed if he didn't stop squeezing it the whole time I was there. As a matter of fact, he threw it in my face when I wasn't looking to make sure I was paying attention. He caught my surprise and let out a belly laugh that truly showed me that Frank was back.

However, he was not completely out of the woods. We did not yet know the full extent of his injuries, and only after rehab and time would we fully understand. After spending another week at Loyola, he made the transfer to Marion Joy rehabilitation center to complete physical and occupational therapy. Even though he was closer to being home, he was still anxious to make it all the way back. Frank was making rapid progress and it appeared that he was going to make a full recovery. The cast on his left leg went halfway up his thigh, so he wasn't very mobile. While it was frustrating for him, he knew that it was temporary and didn't complain about it that much.

Well, after a couple of weeks at Marion Joy, he came home. As it turns out, he came home the day before my birthday, making it best gift that I have ever received. Once again, this is not a slight to the gifts I have received in the since then, but nothing will ever replace the fact that I got to have my only brother back to help me celebrate my birthday and his, which is four days after mine.

I hope this post does not appear to be self indulgent, but I wanted to share this experience with you guys since it is so important to me. This singular event has shaped my life more than any other experience. Whenever I feel down on myself or need something to remind me that things are not as bad as they could be, I look back on this fateful day. No book or movie will ever be able to motivate me as much as this real life experience. I understand that not everyone has such an event to look back on, but this explains my skepticism when it comes to people telling me that I need to read the Secret or the latest greatest fade, because to be honest, I do not see how they will be able to recreate this experience that I actually lived through.

This all being said, I would like to dedicate this entry to my one and only older brother, Frank. I love you very much and cannot imagine a better older brother. You have given me more than I could have ever imagined and continue to inspire me to this very day.